beck's blog

Saturday, May 26, 2007

Tea and Sympathy with Sock Monkey Friends Snape and Dumbledore

(All images are clickable for enlargement).






"I tell you Severus, I'm still in shock. I can't believe all that's happened to me. Thank goodness you answered my Order of the Phoenix Bat-Signal...."

"Sir, it isn't called a bat-signal, it's a...."

"...because I really didn't know how much longer I could hold on.






By the way, when were you ever in Indiana?"

"Oh, Headmaster, I've been many, many places in my lifetime.
More tea?
I believe you were going to tell me how you wound up in a Goodwill store?"

"What? Oh yes! It was horrible! I was, um, is......is that a snake on the table?"






"Oh, blast! It's one of Nagini's horrid little pests. Scat! Shoo! Out you go!"

"Where is Nagini, by the way?"

"Oh she's off doing that Moldy Clump of Vomitous White Toxic Spewage's bidding. And don't worry about ol' Rat-tail. I've petrified him until you are to leave, Sir. You know that Rat's been spying on me even from the lavatory?! Unbelievable! I detest him!"






"Oh, Severus! I'm really so sorry about that. Who would've thought young Peter Pettigrew would..."

"I would have thought, sir! But did you listen to me even then? No! And look at where I am now!"






(standing), "Well at least you're not stuck in a toy bin full of naked women all named Barbie who are all trying to braid your beard hair while talking about their lousy good-for-nothing boyfriends, (all named Ken)!"

"Calm down, sir, calm down. I didn't mean to.......did you say...naked?"

"And identical, each and every one of them! The only difference was their hair or skin color. Other than that, exact clones. It was so frightening. And me, without a stich of clothing on myself!"

"You? Sir. Had nothing on either?"

"No, Severus. It was all somehow taken away. If that kind lady hadn't rescued me, I'd have been a love slave to those Harpy women..."

"I believe it was Barbie women, sir."

"...those Barbie ladies for sure! By the way, Severus, what do you think of my lovely crocheted cloak and clothes?"

"Well sir I..."

"Check it out. I'll take off the cloak. See this snazzy one-piece no-sleeve striped robe? Very soft and comfy. And the hat.."






"Sir,....it looks a bit....clownish, sir. I didn't want to say anything but..."

"Oh, Severus. Like I'm going to take fashion criticism from you, of all people. Mr. Johnny-Cash-Man-In-Black with your..."

"Johnny Cash?"

"black this and your black that. You could never pull off something this wild."

"Nor would I want to, sir."






"Careful where you put your hand, Severus."

"Sorry, sir. I thought you might tip over there for a minute."






"Hmm, yes. I think I'll have a seat."

"Sir, you could put your things back on. I think your hat is on my foot. And what are those things on your face?"






"Ahem, yes, well. I believe she tried to make glasses for me."

"How is that working out then?"

"Can't see a bloody thing. But I didn't tell her. She worked so hard on them. What's that book you have there, Sev?"






"Oh, you'll never believe it. It's the seventh Harry Potter book. I swiped an editor's copy. A simple matter, really. I popped in, grabbed the copy off the nightstand, and popped out. No one guarding it at all. And you'll certainly not believe what-all she has in store for me to do in this last book, I mean, really! Who will believe it!"

"Severus! You stole the book?! Shame on you!.....What does it say?"






"Now, now, sir, don't trouble yourself with it. Here, have more tea."






"Do I come back as a ghost like poor Alec Guiness? Tell me....Is that teacup from Hawaii? When were you in Hawaii, Severus?"

"Oh, Headmaster, I had such a great time! You really should go. They have these hula dancers who..."






"Damn! It's that pesky snake again. Careful, he's on your beard. Where's my wand?"

"Severus, I need to be going anyway. I must see Hagrid about putting my lifeless body in the Goodwill drop-box at the Walmart store parking lot. You take care now and see to it that young Harry learns the spells needed to defeat Voldemort, right? Now I'm off. Perhaps I'll also pop in that travel agency in town and see about Hawaii. Take care, Severus!"

"Good-bye, sir." (closes door). Now, where can I find a Goodwill store with a naked Barbie bin?

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Puppet Pal Snape Car Seat Cover

This post is to cheer up my sister who is in the hospital.
I hope you have access to a laptop and I hope you get better soon!


I have been busy. This is my sort of crocheted homage to the very witty Neil Cicierega; creator of the fabulous "Potter Puppet Pals" clips.





It is a Snape Puppet Pal Car Seat Cover. (Click on the pics for enlargement).
You can put it on your driver's seat.
This way, when you get up to leave he will be guarding your car until you return.
The second pic. shows the back of the seat.
I attached three black elastic bands and crocheted two string ties on the top to prevent it from slipping down.





These are just two shots of how it looks from the front. Of course Snape would absolutely be driving a green VW Beetle! These pictures cracked me up as I was taking them.





Now, for those fans of "Driving Miss Daisy", we have Snape in the passenger seat riding "shotgun" for you.
You could say you were "Driving Professor Snape". (Although; in light of recent events, I don't think he's a Professor anymore.)
Then it would be "Driving Mr. Snape"

(But I don't think he'd help you with directions or map-reading however.)

I like him over here better because then you can drive around and people can see him.
I haven't been brave enough to try it out myself yet.

And you can see I've taken my photos inside the garage with the door down so my neighbors couldn't see what I was doing.
Yes, I am a big chicken.

Cyn!!!

Polish Flag "Man-Bag" or "Fied-bag"

Well, Marcia Fiedorowicz, because you asked, (and you never said whether your hubby wanted to see a Polish flag bag for himself or for you), I made this zippered Polish flag man-bag.
My three boys call these man-bags. They are for putting your shaving items and toiletries in when you travel.
I have dubbed it, (and I hope you don't mind), the "Fied-bag" in honor of your fabulous Polish family name. (I am Czechoslovakian (Bohemian) on my fathers side and this is also the flag of Bohemia).
We are artsy-craftsy people indeed!!!






(Images are clickable for enlargement.)
The front and back. I put a wrist handle on the side and a sort of tab on the other side to make it easier to open and close the zipper. I had to sew the zipper in by hand. My sewing machine stinks and we have a hate-hate relationship. Needless to say, I did not put in a fabric lining either.






I propped it up with a rectangular tissue box so you could compare the size. The zipper is a dark navy blue, not black. It was all I had. I need to secure the unused zipper portion that is on the inside a little better. If a lining was sewn in, this wouldn't even be seen.

There you have it. Hope you like it! I wish I had a cool Polish coat of arms patch to put on it. It would go in the middle of the white stripe. It would look something like this. Polish flag with coat of arms

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Vote

Well, did you vote?

Of course I'm talking about the "Crochet Food Challenge" over at Craftster.org, what did you think??! Lol!!!
(Remember The Milky Way Breastfeeding Symbol Nap Sack I posted about a couple of weeks ago? Yeah, that contest).

The polling runs now through May 15th. So if you haven't voted yet; scoot on over to the above link, check out the entries, and cast your vote.
(I'm not sure if you have to be a registered member of Craftster to be allowed to vote, but registration is free and if you're the crafty type this place is really for you anyway.)

There are so many awesome entries in the contest, it's hard to choose just one.

Anyway, I'm excited about it. I hope some of you can make it over there to vote.

Monday, May 07, 2007

More Flag Bags

I was looking through my craft supplies and found these really cool patches I had bought for my son about 10 years ago. I had meant to sew them onto a jean jacket he once had, but I never got around to it and they eventually wound up in a craft box.
Well, since I hadn't made any flag bags for these countries yet, I decided to use them and make purses for these four countries.




France, Germany, Austria, and Switzerland.
(Images are clickable for enlargement).







One side has the patch, the other side is simply the flag as it is. Each of the smaller flag bags is 7 inches by 10 inches.
Since the French stripes go up and down, I did this one starting at the side and working across. (It was a lot easier for color changing at the end of the rows instead of having three colors to deal with going from top to bottom).






Germany's colors are listed as black, red, and gold. However, I have a skein of Red Heart gold see here, and it wasn't the right color as the photos I googled of Germany's flag. So I used yellow. I hope no one minds. It's the exact color as in the patch.
With the patch on, this flag resembles their official flag of Federal authorities, (if you took off the name of their country which is on the patch). Here's a photo from wikipedia with the two flags.






I like how the patches have the countries spelled in their language as well as English. With the patch on, the flag resembles Austria's state flag. (If you took off the country's name on the patch). You can see a photo of their state flag here.
Once I finished crocheting the graph (twice) in one continuous piece, I folded it over and crocheted around them with a black border. So, the border is actually holding the purse together. Black makes the flags colors stand out nicely.
The handle/strap is simply front post double crochet, back post double crochet. It makes it nice and strong.






Switzerland was the most difficult. Oh sure. It looks easy enough. A square. BUT, with tunisian afghan stitching, the stitch is a bit longer than it is wide. So, even though all the rows are their correct amount in length and height, it still isn't a perfect square. It measures 13 inches wide by 15 inches long. Ahhh! And to top it off, I ran out of the bold red yarn. I had to use a different red, (cherry red), on one side. (I also checked here to find out that the red color is not standardized. So I thought it would be ok. This strap is longer and you can actually wear the strap completely across your head and chest. I used a third red color yarn for the strap and border. Its Caron One Pounder in claret, (the other was scarlet).

So, anyway, this is how they wound up. I wish I took the photos outside as it is dificult to see the colors properly with flash photography.